Monday, October 06, 2008

becoming an american

I spent the weekend taking care of the lawn.

Bought a lawnmower, fired that boy up, mowed like a maniac.

Borrowed my father-in-law's weed-whacker, whacked the hell out of many a weed.

Then stood there, downed a cold Budweiser, and considered what I had done.

Stood there nodding in appreciation and self-regard, the primitive American male mantra rising unbidden to the front of my mind.

"Good lawn. Good work. Me hungry."

Holy Gob and all of the saints, I need to get back to the city.

I need some random shouting and ear-splitting sirens and packs of young tattooed bohos jaywalking and jabbering self-importantly about their retro-punk ska band.

Need that sweet-sour smell of the Chinatown garbage rising in the morning sun.

But, man. Seriously.

You should see that lawn.

Our MMMQ stays in the hills and tests your redneck I.Q. and/or your encyclopedic knowledge of late 60s prime-time televised entertainment.

Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs, acknowledged masters of Country and Western, appeared on what T.V. show as "Cousin" Lester and "Cousin" Earl?

Was it

1. Petticoat Junction

2. The Beverly Hillbillies

3. The Andy Griffith Show

4. Hootenanny


5. Dragnet

Winners get a Cabin in the Sky, losers have to sleep outside with the dogs.


Ann said...

Country music is my kryptonite.

I *was* going to go with Hootenanny, because it contains the word 'Ann'.

But my husband strolled past the computer and dropped this little knowledge nugget on my head:

"They did the theme song for the Beverly Hillbillies, you know."

He even sang it for me.

So I guess Jim's in the MMMQ this week - I can't really take credit for his work, can I? Let me check my marriage vows and get back to you...

John said...

In the Catholic faith, when you get married you are technically "one flesh".

Which saves you a lot of money in clothing, let me tell you.

But you guys are heathens, right?

Ann said...

Jim's a Lutheran. I'm a heathen.

Actually...what's heathen-ier than a heathen? I'm...that.

John said...

Full-on pagan, baby.

Paint yourself blue and dance to the music.

Anonymous said...

righto. first time to leave my mark on the wonder that is the blogging world. i feel as though i have graduated from the position of creepy blogger stalker, to active participant in the fully functioning society that is "bloggopolis".

now being a southern boy born and raised i feel quite confident. Flatt and Scruggs did in fact write the theme song for the Beverly Hillbillies. and i believe they appeared on the show several times as themselves.

grew up watching that show...reruns of course. it was long before my time.


John said...


Welcome to the cave, my son. Pay no attention to those shadows.

I probably saw the original broadcasts.

Back then, T.V ended at a decent hour and you had nothing to do but talk or sleep through the night.

This was before fire, clocks and opposable digits.

The good old days.

Rose said...

Lol. Definitely Dragnet. That show rocked. Watch those shadows. Sometimes out in suburbia they're wandering skunks. Saw one this evening. Almost took off my foot. Danger! Warning! Poconos can kill!

Anonymous said...

yes, of course. long before opposable digits. seeing as there was ne'er a use for them before the invention of text messaging.