the return

Lovely spring morning here in Rat City. Doctor Bessey told us yesterday that today is the day.

We'll see. I'm taking a tip from the old Muslim boys: when speaking of any future event, tag "God willing" at the end.

Or Gob willing, if you prefer.

Couldn't sleep last night, thinking that she might be home today.

Also, had to haul out all the empty whiskey bottles and chase out the prostitutes.

What's with prostitutes these days? Used to be they'd just steal your wallet and leave you in peace, now they're hanging out, eating all your cereal, leaving their underwear drying in the shower, it's just no good.

MMMQ on this most eventful day (Gob willing) tests not so much your musical knowledge as your psychic ability.

When I was a kid, playing with my sisters in the red brick house on Washington Avenue and something would go wrong in whatever game we were playing and I'd run to my room and slam the door and cry and yell, there was one song that my sisters would put on the old eight-track player that I couldn't hear and not come back out and stand in front of the speakers. It always brought me back.

What got little Johnny back in the game? Was it:

1. Mr. Tambourine Man, by Mr. Dylan

2. Cecilia, Simon and Garfunkel

3. Crunchy Granola Suite, Neil Diamond

4. Mm-Bop, Hanson

Do the mind-meld with me now and the answer should be right there.

I'm going to go put it on right now and see if anyone's up for a game of freeze tag.